It's that time of year again where I have to start thinking about what happens in the future, make 'grown up' decisions and make lots of to do lists. Of course, It's time for portfolio preparation and university interviews again. Yesterday to my surprise I found out that I am now half way through my art foundation course, and it seems like only yesterday I was blogging about how scared I was to start, and talking about how much of a loner I was going to be. Well yeah, I was wrong. I love this course, I love my 'dysfunctional art family' and I've grown a little bit attached to the comfortable surroundings of the studio, so much that sometimes I prefer to spend my time there than at home. But, sadly, it's time to think about moving on, AGAIN. And as this course is only a year long course, I'm now preparing for my degree, which is a little bit scary because this time I really won't know anyone. It's always this time of the year I have absolutely no faith in myself or my work, I start to over think everything and the 'what ifs' start springing into my mind, And I know quite a few people preparing for interviews who feel the same way at the moment.
Technology has decided that it hates me, Everything is crashing. Photoshop, Spotify, Google Chrome, my camera corrupted my memory cards the other day and is now not working, I think karma is happening right now. But the annoying thing is, every time I'm feeling a little bit motivated and inspired and go to do work, it crashes. It's like it knows and is saying "Oh, Lauren's about to do some important work which may change her life, let's mix things up a bit and die on her."
We're getting reviews of our portfolios in class and as nice as it is to get feedback on the layout and the things you're putting in it, it has confused the hell out of me. After re-arranging my portfolio like crazy, my design tutor suggested that I replace the introductory page (first photo) with an A3 print of my fashion week photograph. The thing is, I already have two pages on my fashion piece, and as much as I'm proud of that piece of work, I don't want my face at the beginning of my portfolio. But anyway, I went with his idea, paid money to get it printed, put it in my portfolio and felt massively underwhelmed, as well as my parents saying "Are you really putting that at the front?". So my problem is, do i go with my gut instinct? Or forget about that and go with my teachers? I know that if I don't go with my instinct I'm not going to feel confident about my portfolio. Right now I'm 99.9% going with my gut instinct. This post was very moan-worthy, and a bit of a ramble, but to anyone that is in the same boat right now, I wish you luck with your interviews and university applications :-)
(Little bit sad that I couldn't make this post look a little more snazzy, but Photoshop of course, crashed on me)